random: irrefutable claim #1

Irrefutable fact: I never liked Genesis.
Irrefutable fact #2: I find Phil Collins to be an annoying gnat.
Irrefutable fact #3: He was everywhere in the 80’s. EVERYWHERE.
Irrefutable fact #4: my MOTHER likes Phil Collins.
(which isn’t fair. Mom grew up listening to Frank Sinatra and hanging out in jazz clubs in Chicago listening to Ahmad Jamal. Mom has good taste in music. Sorry, Mom)

I am at work last week, and someone has music on. This is the conversation I have with myself:
Hmm, what is this?
Phil Collins.
Solo or Genesis?
Something live.
Okay, it’s radio, that tinny compression, so it has to be released.
Didn’t they have some triple live album at some point?
Yeah, maybe.

Eventually, it dawns on me, crosses my filters because I can’t tune it out. This is because Genesis are covering “Everybody Needs Somebody To Love” tagged with “Satisfaction” and then “All Day And All Of The Night,” as part of some abysmal live performance of “Turn It On Again,” back when Genesis was a band you desperately had to pretend to like, or at least Appreciate Their Contribution To Rock And Roll less you be considered some kind of neanderthal.

This abomination is, apparently, from some Live At Wembley release from 1987 (thank you Google, where the reviewer mentions that this medley “is always good fun to hear” and notes that there is an ALTERNATIVE version to be found on the “Live at Knebworth” double CD – I guess if anything was going to accurately define “Late 1980’s Adult Oriented Rock Bombast” it would be any band of a stature and demographic to make it worthwhile to release a “Live At Knebworth”. Who else was ever live at
Knebworth except overblown balding rock gods? The Who were live at Leeds and live at Charlton, but they never released some poncy “Live at Knebworth” crap album–

(okay. I know. The Who, the band who defined what the live album was supposed to be, after that only ever released crappy live albums – and I mean truly crappy. waste of money, not even worth buying for the one-extra-track-you-don’t-officially-have, badly sequenced and compressed bordering on KISS Alive-sounding)

I’m sorry. Where was I? Genesis. Phil Collins.

And people in my high school wondered why I turned to the Ramones as my personal lord and saviour? Do I even need another reason? The answer is NO. The answer always was no.